By Sara Goff Courtesy of Coalition for Divorce Reform “Young love is a flame; very pretty, very hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. The love of the older and disciplined heart is as coals, deepburning, unquenchable.” ~ Henry Ward Beecher (from RQ Relationship Intelligenceby Richard A. Panzer) In my late twenties, I found myself in a two-year relationship, despite feeling marginally loved and never more insecure. “He must love me if we’re a couple and sleeping together,” I told myself. I wasn’t happy, wasn’t being honest with myself, but it was so easy to let sex cover the lie. [...]
By Hugo Schwyzer Courtesy of ifstudies.org WARNING: Following essay includes an honest discussion of one man's infidelity and its consequences in his life and the lives of his children. It is a Sunday night at my ex-wife’s house, and I’m getting ready to say goodbye to the kids after a happy, rough-and-tumble afternoon. As I prepare to leave, my six-year-old son goes to the bookcase and pulls out a slim, black volume, clutching it tightly to his chest. I ask to see what he’s holding, and he hands it over, but not before kissing the image on the front. It’s [...]
The Surprising Health Benefits Of Arguing
Could arguments actually be good for your health? That seems to be the case, if science has anything to say about it.
The idea is a pretty simple, and applies to just about every relationship in our lives: our bosses, co-workers, significant others, or our children. If we’re taking action to avoid confrontation with people, we may be making ourselves susceptible to physical problems, more than we’d have if we actually saw the argument through to the end.
Parental conflict can do lasting damage to kids
Date: March 28, 2018
Source: University of Vermont
Summary: Even relatively low-level adversity like parental conflict can do lasting damage to children, a new study finds. Shy children are especially vulnerable.
It stands to reason that parents who physically or emotionally abuse their children do them lasting damage, among other things by undermining their ability to trust others and accurately read their emotions.
But what about the children of parents who experience simple, everyday conflict?
New research published in the current issue of the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships shows that the emotional processing of these children, too, can be affected — potentially making them over-vigilant, anxious and vulnerable to distorting human interactions that are neutral in tone, throwing them off-balance interpersonally as adults.
“The message is clear: even low-level adversity like parental conflict isn’t good for kids,” said Alice Schermerhorn, an assistant professor in the University of Vermont’s Department of Psychological Sciences and the lead author of the study.